What Do You Want If You're A Woman Over 40?
Apr 06, 2021
What Do You Want If You're A Woman Over 40? (Part 1)
I found this quote online and it really spoke to me:
It got me thinking about women my age (mid forties- ish) and around my age who want more out of life, but still seem to be STUCK. Is that you? I know I have had periods in life where I was stuck. In fact, that definitely was me up until about two and a half years ago.
But let’s talk about you first. How’s your life, girl? Does this sound familiar: You go to bed after everyone else. You wake up before everyone else. You get the kids ready (or maybe you just get yourself ready for work if you don’t have kids). You give eight hours at work - online or in the office. You get home or sign off your computer. You’re exhausted. You get dinner. There’s no more energy for anything else. You shower. You go to bed. Sleep. Wake up, tired. Rinse and repeat.
And you tell yourself there’s no time to do anything else. Okay, except that your health is suffering; your relationship is disintegrating; your sex life is dormant; your finances are slipping away; your dreams generally, are getting cobwebs girl.
Can I ask, where are YOU in that daily grind? How come your world is trying to tell YOU what to do, instead of YOU determining who YOU want to be? Have you settled for what life has become, instead of going after what you want life to be? In some areas perhaps? In others, no?
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In February of 2020, I took a professional photo, because by then, I had decided that I was going to return to speaking and inspiring people for my business.
The photo on the left (Photo 1) is the first photo I took. The photo on the right (Photo 2) was taken about three weeks later, when I realized I no longer wanted to look like the “nice girl” in Photo 1.
Photo 1 was safe, nice, polite, it was also the kind of photo I took back when I lived in Saint Lucia. When I received Photo 1, I looked into my smiling face and I realized that I was no longer that person. Everything in the photo was not enough me, from the very corporate jacket and tame inner blouse, to the lovely, rounded haircut and slight makeup.I I called up the photo company, made another appointment and began to reimagine myself as I had become.
I put down a new list of adjectives and phrases to describe myself: bold, sexy, tech savvy, runner, cutting edge, hip, beast, warrior, strong, confident, interesting, integral, authentic, pleasant, unconventional lover of God.
Yep. I put down those adjectives first, and then I began to see a new image of myself in my mind’s eye. The turtle neck emerged; the haircut emerged; the side profile, the slight smile. I went out and bought the black turtleneck, I got the haircut and the color, and the rest happened in the studio. (I didn’t quite get the make up done right, but say what). And I will do another corporate photo, but it will be a bit edgier, even in a jacket.
About three weeks later, the world went into lockdown and I was ready. I put the new pic out and someone who knew me commented “This photo looks like you have your s**t together!” That comment made me do a happy dance. It was exactly how I wanted the world to see my brand. And so I began Basement Chronicles, then the Lives, then the poetry, then the blog, and by God’s grace, there is more to come.
I’m not bragging. It’s what I did, and continue to do, and the whole point is to inspire you to get up and decide today on who you want to be.
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