The Importance of Choosing to Be Happy

finding purpose mindset motivation Mar 30, 2021

GROWN WOMAN SYNDROME...

Hey you, have you lost a bit of that childlike wonder because you’re a grown woman and you’ve ‘been there, done that and no one better tell you anything”? Girl, lighten up! Crack a smile and look up at the sky. Everyone has stuff going on, believe it or not. In spite of your difficulties, do not give up on yearning for the good in this life, because it has not all been bad - even for you.

A few days ago, I spoke to a good friend I had not connected with in a while, and after I hung up, I felt sad, you know? Life had not worked out the way she wanted. She was struggling with health issues, one of her kids was out of a job, and her marriage was on the rocks. She had changed from the fun-loving, spontaneous woman I used to know, to a woman with a hollowed out voice and subdued temperament. (The article continues after the Basement Chronicles pic)

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Me with my everly positive self? I was like a deer in headlights. At first I didn’t know what to say, until I realized that I too have experienced EPIC disappointment: business failure, friendship betrayals, major relationship DIS-integration, academic failure, an eating disorder, clinical depression - yes the whole nines. I had something by way of sincere commiseration to offer her, and I did. (Article continues below my free gift to you below!)

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WE HAVE A CHOICE IN THE HAPPY MATTER

But I won’t pretend there is not a but...The BUT for me, even after everything I’ve been through, is that I still believe, I still hope, I still think it pays to be positive and to know that it will not always be bad. I have not given up on life or friends or relationships even though I have suffered great losses.

When I hung up, it occurred to me that the older you get, the more cynical you become. And that cynicism can make you lose your joy in life. Cynicism is our shield against disappointment and hurt and betrayal, isn’t it?

But the price we pay for our shield of cynicism is that we lose the ability to see the positive possibilities in life; we often times lose our joy.

And girl, I am NOT losing my joy, not after coming off those happy pills for good (Article continues below the SPEAK WITH CONFIDENCE offer)

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CAN YOU STILL BE JOYFUL IN A HURTFUL WORLD?

Is it possible to be wise and still be joyful? To know the sordid nature of humanity and still expect what little good can come? To be strategic in how you relate to people and still delight in people? To prepare for the worst, but also prepare for the eventuality of the best?

I believe it is.

A friend once told me that I was always so earnest. I think he meant that I was optimistic, and wide eyed about everything about life. That’s okay. I used to try to be like some people I used to admire - you know - the stoic, guarded, stony faced people, who give monosyllabic responses and drop their voices into their chest when they speak to you in an effort to seem confident. I’ve tried being that way, but then I forget and start smiling. It’s just not worth it. Might as well choose happy.

I hope you find some corner of joy in your life, no matter how small. I hope you look up often at the sky, that you smile while you’re alone, and that you hum a tune from your childhood, in spite of. Because no matter what, we have to believe. LD

🧠 WHAT I LEARNED THIS WEEK

You don’t have to be the same person you were as a kid in high school, even when you meet old high school friends you have not seen for a long time. Gently insist on being your new self. Do not settle on anyone else - including the old you.

🦉 QUOTE I LOVED THIS WEEK

Your natural hair is a gift from God. Stop hiding it! (This quote is from a friend’s status on What’s App)

TATG BOOKCLUB IS NOW ON FACEBOOK!

So, we started the TO ALL THE GIRLS BOOKCLUB on Facebook! This is a bookclub for women interested in reading personal development books on a regular basis. TATG Bookclub meets on the last weekend of every month.

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Did you know that I wrote a book in 2017? I often forget to tell you guys about my novella How George Jones Saved Christmas which is available on AMAZON. Click on the image to check it out in Kindle and in paperback.

What is this novella about? The blurb is below:

Twelve-year-old Christy loves everything about Christmas in Saint Lucia: awakening to the smell of delicious beef and pork stewing on coal pots, playing dolls with her cousin Sweetie, and of course, singing along to the music of George Jones. The traditions are threatened when a quarrel breaks out between Christy’s mother, Merm, and her aunt Mabel. It’s not just a minor tiff between sisters, either: they are so angry with each other that Mabel threatens to spend Christmas with her family in a hotel, and Merm declares that her own family—Christy and her siblings—will spend Christmas Day by themselves."

The Importance of Choosing to Be Happy

HAVE YOU DOWNLOADED MY FREE EBOOK yet? Click on the pic to go grab this great resource!

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I hope you find some corner of joy in your life, no matter how small. I hope you look up often at the sky, that you smile while you’re alone, and that you hum a tune from your childhood, in spite of. Because no matter what, we have to believe. LD

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